


The Accident

by halfwit



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Guilty Castiel, Hospitals, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt Impala, I stink at tagging, M/M, Not Beta Read, Sad Castiel, Turned out much longer than expected, Worried Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-11-16
Updated: 2014-11-16
Packaged: 2018-02-25 15:03:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,643
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2626082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/halfwit/pseuds/halfwit
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It was a stupid fight, but Dean left before Castiel could apologize - will he ever get the chance?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is by far the longest fan fiction story I have ever written. It also is the first time I have written Dean and Cas together, and the first time I have written alternate universe. I hope you all like. Comments are welcome! Please enjoy.
> 
> This is not betaed, any mistakes are my own. This was also written very quickly while I was up with my sick daughter, so I apologize for any mistakes :-)

Castiel Novak anxiously looked up at the clock on the wall only to find only two minutes had passed since he last looked. That seemed impossible. The numbers mocking him in their passage. He felt like entire lifetimes had passed since he first received the call. It was such a stupid thing. He and Dean had been planning where they were going to go to college, it should have been fun; but, when are things ever easy between him and Dean Winchester?

Castiel sighed and started to pace the small waiting room again. Dean’s younger brother Sam was fitfully sleeping in the chair, he had lost his fight against sleep about a half hour prior. Dean’s parents, John and Mary, had left the waiting area to make calls to family and inform their employers they would not be coming in the next day. So, that left Castiel alone with his thoughts…not a place he wanted to be. He wanted to know his boyfriend was going to be okay. This was all his fault, if he hadn’t teased Dean, the other man never would have left so angry.

Banging his head against the door frame, Castiel wished he could go back in time those few hours and stop himself from uttering those words. He and Dean had been talking forever about going to college together, even before they started dating. The two always had been inseparable, best friends, so it only made sense that they wouldn’t want to be apart in college. When they started dating a few months ago, that only made the plans easier, it was deciding what college to go to that was difficult. Dean thought he wanted to study engineering and mechanics while Cas wanted to pursue religion and philosophy. Good schools that offered both majors were not easy to find.

“Face it, Dean,” Castiel said flippantly, “It will be easier for me to get into a school than you, so we might as well worry about where you get in, and I will follow.”

“What is that supposed to mean?” Dean asked, hurt and anger warring in his eyes. “Do you think that I am not as smart as you are?”

“Well, no, I don’t mean that at all,” Cas said, surprised at the look in his boyfriend’s eye, but oblivious to what he said to cause it. “I just mean that with my GPA, it will be easier for me to get in than you.”

In a way, Cas was right. Dean really hadn’t put his full focus on high school. He had been having too much fun with parties, and then when his mother had been ill his sophomore year, Dean devoted his attentions more fully to his family; taking on part-time jobs to help with money, and practically raising Sam during that time until his mother was on her feet again. Dean’s grades dropped so low that year, there had been a question as to whether he was going to advance or if he would fail. Cas helped him to study, and Dean was just able to squeak by. Of course, Dean’s GPA dropped drastically because of that, and even though he brought everything back in his junior and senior years, and scored well on his SATs, the marks on his sophomore year were problematic. This was all that Castiel had meant by his comment; however, Dean always was insecure about his intelligence – that seemed to happen when you thought both your boyfriend and brother were geniuses. Dean had more than one teacher remark to him that he must be so proud of how smart Sam was and how limitless his options were. Dean was proud of his brother, but it always hurt when people didn’t see how smart Dean was, just because he was a little less flashy about it. Now, for Cas to imply he felt Dean wasn’t as smart either, that just made something snap in him.

“Yeah, right Cas,” Dean said angrily. He grabbed his leather jacket off Cas’ chair and hurried to the door. “I forgot we can’t all be as smart as you.”

“Dean, wait.” Cas yelled after him. “I didn’t mean you aren’t smart. I know that you are. Come back, please don’t leave like this.”

“Maybe it’s better like this,” Dean said without turning around. He didn’t want Cas to see the tears in his eyes. “This way you can pick wherever you want to go and don’t have to be held back by your dumb loser of a boyfriend.”

The door slammed and a moment later the roar of Dean’s vehicle could be heard as he barreled down the street. Castiel stayed rooted in place; he was bewildered. How could things have gotten so bad, so fast? He knew it was his fault. He knew Dean for all his charm and bravado was sensitive and insecure at heart. Dean always gave his all to those he loved, but never felt worthy of that in return, so it made sense that when Cas made his comment that Dean would take it the wrong way. He hadn’t meant it the way Dean took it, but he should have been more thoughtful.

Standing in the hallway for a minute longer, Castiel finally roused himself to move back to his room. He gathered up all his college materials and went to put them on his window sill. As he put the brochures back, he glanced outside for the first time. There was snow everywhere, and not just snow, but ice as well. Castiel frowned. When had the weather gotten that bad? Sure, it was January in Kansas, but when Dean came over after school, the roads were clear. Less than three hours later, there was a considerable amount of snow on the ground.

Pulled from his thoughts, he heard the front door open and his mother call for him. He came downstairs and saw her covered in snow.

“Oh, Castiel,” his mother said, relief coloring her tone. “I am so glad you are home. I was worried you were out with Dean in this weather.”

“No, Mom. I’ve been home since right after school.”

“That’s good,” she said. “The roads are terrible. I barely made it home. The weather forecasters are saying this is a freak ice storm that they didn’t think would come. I passed a couple of accidents on my way home.”

“I’m glad you’re home safe,” Castiel told his mother. He was glad; he loved his mother and never would have wanted anything to happen to her. However, her description of the weather made a pit of fear and worry settle in his stomach. Dean had been so upset when he left that Castiel knew he was driving too fast. His boyfriend was an excellent driver, but Cas worried that he wasn’t thinking clearly when he left and if the roads were that bad, could he have gotten in trouble.

Hurrying back up the stairs to his room, Castiel grabbed his phone to call Dean. The phone rang four times before he got Dean’s voice mail: This is Dean, you know what to do (beep).

“Dean, I know you are probably angry with me right now, but please just call or text me to let me know you got home safely. My mom says the roads are terrible right now, and I am worried about you. I am so sorry we fought. I love you and I don’t think I am smarter than you, I want you to know that. Please just call me so we can get through this.”

Ending the call, Castiel sat on the edge of his bed, worrying his lower lip between his teeth. He didn’t think Dean would be so spiteful as to ignore his call and the pleas that were evident in his tone. They had fought plenty over their dozen years of friendship and three years of a relationship, and Dean never would allow Cas to worry or be upset needlessly. Sitting back on his bed, Castiel grabbed his history book and tried to concentrate on the American Revolution, but it was impossible. After he read the same sentence for the fifteenth time without really knowing what it said, he gave up. Running his hands through his already tasseled dark brown hair, Castiel tried to calm himself. Even before his mother came home, he had a bad feeling hanging around him. He hated when he and Dean fought, he knew they would be able to set it right, but until then it would bother him.

He went back downstairs to help his mother get everything set up for dinner. He kept his cell phone close at hand so he would know the instant that Dean responded to him.

After an hour, Castiel was really getting nervous. The snow and ice had stopped falling and the road crews were out clearing and salting the roads to make them passable for drivers, but still no word from Dean. Castiel had sent numerous text messages and left ten more voice mail messages – ranging from annoyed at his boyfriend, to terrified – but, still no word. He hesitated calling Sam or Dean’s parents because he didn’t want to upset them or involve them in a quarrel between the two of them; but, as time went on, he couldn’t help the dread that seeped into his veins. This wasn’t like his boyfriend. Dean was hotheaded and quick to anger, but he also was kind, loving, and compassionate. He loved fiercely and he never would have caused Cas unnecessary worry, even if he was mad.

Two hours after Dean left, Castiel’s phone rang. It was from Dean’s house.

“Dean? Thank God you are okay, when you didn’t answer your phone I was so worried,” the words tumbled out of his mouth without stop, he was so happy.

“Castiel?”

His heart stopped. That was not Dean’s voice, that was Mary’s voice, and she sounded like she was crying.

“Mrs. Winchester?” he responded, hearing the fear and desperation in his own voice.

“Castiel, sweetie, there’s been an accident. It’s Dean.”

The phone dropped from Cas’ suddenly bloodless fingers and his knees gave out from underneath him, plummeting him to the floor. At the noise, Castiel’s mother came running into the kitchen to find her son shaking uncontrollably and the phone laying on the ground beside him.

“Castiel? Castiel? Are you still there?” Mary’s voice came through the speaker of the phone.

“Mary? This is Naomi,” Castiel’s mother said as she picked up the phone. “What’s happened?”

Everything seemed to move in slow motion, as though he were underwater. Castiel could see his mother talking on the phone. He saw her expression change to fear and sadness. He could see her lips moving, but he couldn’t hear what was coming out of her mouth. He was hardly even aware that he started rocking himself back and forth on the floor in his shock and panic. He wasn’t even aware he was talking until his mother wrapped him in a protective embrace.

“This is not your fault, sweetheart,” she said to her son. “Even if you both fought, nothing that happened was your fault. Dean loves you, and he knows you love him. You both are too bull-headed at times to realize that, but it is something you can’t stop. Whatever happened before he left, you know he probably forgave you as soon as he was on the road. Even if he didn’t forgive you, yet, he never could stay mad at you for long.”

Tears streaked wet paths down Castiel’s cheeks and as his mother looked into her son’s blue eyes, her heart broke for him. She knew from her conversation with Mary that Dean was in bad shape. He was travelling a windy portion of the road between the Novak and Winchester homes – a road he had driven hundreds of times before and could probably navigate in his sleep. The roads were icy and a driver in the opposite direction lost control of his car and hit into Dean’s vehicle head on. Dean had to be extricated from the vehicle and taken immediately to the nearest hospital where he was undergoing emergency surgery. Mary and Sam were on their way to the hospital now. John was working an extended shift at the police station and they had not been able to get in touch with him, yet.

“I need to go,” Castiel said, brokenly, to his mother. “I need to be with him. I don’t want him to be alone.”

Naomi sighed. She really didn’t want her son out in this weather, but she knew there was no stopping him, and she didn’t want him driving as upset as he was – she didn’t need him getting into an accident as well.

“Get your coat,” she said. “I’ll take you.”

That was five hours ago, and Castiel still hadn’t heard anything more. He was in the family waiting room of the surgical wing of the hospital. Other families had come and gone, but no one had come with news for the Winchesters; he didn’t know if that was a good thing or a bad.

The clock kept ticking its monotone tune above him. Castiel swore the clock was mocking him, as though it were somehow ticking away the moments he had left with his boyfriend.

“Please, God,” Castiel prayed quietly, “don’t take him from me. Give me a chance to tell him how sorry I am and how much I love him.”

It wasn’t long after that Castiel cried himself to sleep.


	2. Chapter 2

He awoke to a hand gently shaking his shoulder. Castiel blinked his eyes groggily and tried to remember why he was so uncomfortable, why his neck hurt so badly. He remembered in a rush, and sat up so fast he made himself dizzy.

“Dean!” he cried. “Where’s Dean?”

“He just came out of surgery,” Mary said softly. “They have him in the ICU wing for recovery.”

Castiel look at his second mother, he could see the pain on her face. These hours of waiting seem to have aged her tremendously; she looked so tired and sad.

“What did the doctors say?” Castiel asked, nervous at her expression.

“The next 24-hours are crucial,” she said. Mary looked over as Cas’ blue eyes widened in shock and fear. She wanted to spare the boy her son loved from what the doctors had told her; but, she knew that he had just as much a right to know as she did.

“They lost him, tw-twice on the table,” tears slipped down her face as she recounted this. Castiel felt the blood leave his face in horror. Dean was invincible, they had to be talking about someone else. Sure, he was banged up, but he would bounce back. Dean promised him they would have forever, and Castiel was going to hold him to that. “He lost so much blood and had severe internal bleeding. The stress was too much for his heart and it caused him to have cardiac arrest on the table. They had to remove his spleen and appendix, both of which were damaged from the accident.”

Shock colored Cas’ features. He knew Dean had been hurt, but he hadn’t realized it was this bad. Guilt settled over him like a physical presence.

“It’s my fault,” he whispered, fresh tears falling down his face. “We fought before he left my house. I said something stupid, without thinking, and it hurt his feelings. I never got a chance to say I was sorry. What if that is the last thing I ever told him? What if he…” Castiel couldn’t finish his sentence. He found his heart being gripped in a vise and he found he couldn’t breathe.

“Shhhh,” Mary said, rubbing her hand up and down Castiel’s back soothingly. “Whatever happened between you, this accident was just that, an accident. It wasn’t your fault. Dean loves you and knows you love him. It is going to be okay. He has never backed down from a fight, he won’t quit on this. He won’t quit on us.”

Mary was trying to convince herself of that as much as her son’s boyfriend. She had to hope that she was telling him the truth because she didn’t know how they would rebuild if Dean didn’t make it.

They sat there for a while longer, giving and receiving comfort as mother and son, until the doctor came back in.

“He is resting in the ICU currently,” Dr. Wilkes said kindly. “He can have one visitor at a time, but for no more than five minutes each.”

Castiel nudged Mary so that she could go. It was only right that she go see her son first, he would see him later. Mary left, eager to see her boy, and left Cas alone with his thoughts again. He knew he had to be strong. He had to be there for Dean, they had a whole future to plan. If nothing else this entire ordeal had solidified the fact that he did not want a future if it did not include Dean Winchester. They were soul mates, and he had a feeling that wherever they would find each other they were meant to be together. He contented himself with that fact as he waited for his turn to see his beloved.


	3. Chapter 3

Cas stood in the hallway outside of Dean’s room. His palms were sweating and he felt like he was going to throw up. Dr. Wilkes and Mary both tried to prepare him for what he was going to see. Instead of soothing him, however, it just made him that much more nervous.

“Castiel,” Mary said, gently from beside him. “You don’t have to go in, if you don’t want to.”

The dark haired teen shook his head slowly. “No, I want to see him.”

“He has a lot of wires and machines hooked up to him, and he has some pretty nasty cuts on his face, but he still is there. Just talk to him, like you normally would. He can sense that you are near.”

Nodding slightly, Castiel took a deep breath and pushed open the door to Dean’s room. He couldn’t look to the bed, not at first. He tried to give himself a moment to ground himself. Looking at the blue and white tiled floor, Castiel first noticed the smell. It was too sterile. It smelled like alcohol and bleach, and he knew those two scents would be ones he would never be able to smell again without reliving this awful experience. Swallowing against the bile rising in his throat, but not raising his eyes from the ground, Castiel next noticed the sounds in the room.

 _Whoosh-whoosh_ , _beep-beep_ , _click-whirl-click-whirl_.

These were the sounds of the machines that were keeping his Dean alive. They were helping him to breathe, helping him to hydrate, helping him to get nourishment, and Castiel hated each sound. Much like the clock in the waiting room, these sounds seemed to engulf him and mock him – marking the passage of time and threatening to take away something that was precious to him.

Knowing he didn’t have much time, Castiel staggered forward. He was afraid. He didn’t want to see his boyfriend broken, but he wanted Dean to feel he was there, to gain comfort from his presence. But, how could he be a comfort to the other teen when he was a husk of himself?

Reaching the edge of the bed, Castiel placed his hand on the metal guardrail and gently ran his index finger over his unconscious boyfriend’s hand, careful to avoid the tubes. Grounding himself in the warmth of Dean’s skin, knowing that warmth meant that Dean still was with him, Castiel lifted his eyes to take in the other boy. He gasped at the sight.

No beautiful green eyes sparkling with mischief met his gaze. Dean’s eyes were shut and dark black bruises lay under the closed lids. Dean was deathly pale – a poor comparison in light of the circumstance, but the only description that came to Cas’ mind – his skin leached of all color, causing his freckles to stand out in sharp relief against his skin. There was a large cut on his cheek that was covered in a white bandage that looked so out of place on Dean’s face that Cas wanted to rip it off. The worst thing, however, was the tube in his mouth. The ventilator was helping Dean to breathe, but it looked so foreign to Cas, the strips of tape keeping it in place in Dean’s lax mouth looked almost painful, although he knew that his boyfriend had no awareness of any pain at the moment.

“I’m so sorry, sweetie,” Cas said, cringing slightly at the pet name he knew Dean hated in public. “This is all my fault. I promise when you come back to me, I will make it up to you. I will give you all the pie you can eat, and we will go see all those awful comic book movies you love so much.”

Sniffling to keep the tears at bay while in the room with Dean, Cas continued, “I love you. I know we don’t say it a lot to each other because you worry about chick-flick moments, but I love you to the end of time. I am so sorry that I implied I didn’t think you were as smart as me. We know that isn’t true. You are the smartest, most clever guy I know, and I thank my lucky stars every day for guiding me to you. You are my everything, my angel.”

At that, a nurse popped her head into the room and told Castiel his time was up for now.

“I love you, Dean Winchester,” Castiel said, leaning over the railing and placing a careful kiss on his boyfriend’s head. “I love you.”


	4. Chapter 4

Time passed at odd intervals after that. Dean made it past the initial 24-hour critical window Dr. Wilkes set forth, but he still had a long way to go for his recovery. He had sustained significant injuries and his body was doing what was best to heal him.

After the first two days of bedside vigils, Naomi came to the hospital to collect her son.

“You aren’t going to do him any good if you end up in a hospital bed next to him,” she sternly told her grieving child. “He wouldn’t want you to harm yourself on his behalf.”

Reluctantly, Castiel agreed. He went home, showered, ate, and went to sleep in his own bed for the first night in what felt like forever. The next morning, his mother dropped him off at school, despite his protests.

“Mary and John have your cell phone number,” she reasoned. “I’ve spoken with your teachers and they have agreed to allow you to have your phone in class for emergencies. If something changes, they will call you, other than that, go to school, learn something, try to focus on something other than the hospital for a little while. He would want that for you.”

Knowing this was true, Castiel trudged into the school building, but wondered how he would be able to focus, guilt and fear still gnawing at his insides.

Surprisingly, the day passed quickly. Castiel had several of his and Dean’s friends come up to him to ask about Dean and to give him support. The teachers were understanding to his situation and tried not to make too many comments when Castiel kept checking his phone every few minutes. It was nice to be away from the hospital setting, even though his thoughts were with his hurt boyfriend the whole day.

After school, Castiel got a ride over to the hospital. He was itching to see Dean. He wanted to tell his boyfriend all about his day, about the good wishes all their friends were sending his way, and the latest on the gossip – rumor was that Ms. Harvelle and Mr. Singer were dating. All-in-all, Castiel was feeling relatively good about everything. He should have known it was too good to last.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the short chapter, I thought it was an interesting bridge to see what was going on and to set the scene for some additional hurt Dean :D.


	5. Chapter 5

Castiel got off the elevator on Dean’s floor, and was immediately greeted by the tear-stained face of Sam Winchester. Castiel felt his world stop.

“Sam, what’s wrong?” Cas asked, nervously. He hadn’t gotten any calls or texts. Why hadn’t anyone let him know if something was wrong?

“It’s Dean,” Sam said, brokenly. “Just a few minutes ago, it looked like he was going to wake up. His eyes started to open, and then all of a sudden, he started shaking violently, like his whole body was being pulled in a million different directions, and this yucky yellow stuff started leaking out of his mouth. The doctor and nurses came in and rushed him out immediately. They took him back to surgery, Mom and Dad are with him now.”

His thoughts were scattered. Castiel didn’t know what to do. It sounded to him like Dean had a seizure. But the yellow goop Sam mentioned sounded like something more serious. What was happening?

“Why didn’t anyone call me,” Cas asked. “I thought you were going to let me know as soon as something happened.”

“It just happened,” Sam said, sadly. “Just a few minutes before you got here. I was just getting ready to text you, but I figured you were on your way and I would rather tell you in person. Let’s get down to the waiting area.”

The two teens staggered almost drunkenly back to the waiting area where they had spent so many hours just a few days prior. Castiel had hoped they were beyond this waiting game – obviously he was wrong. The boys took up their positions on the uncomfortable chairs. Sam pulled out some books to try to do his homework, and Castiel text his mother to let her know the latest. Five minutes later, a very haggard looking John Winchester entered the room. Both boys immediately jumped to their feet and started to talk over each other in their anxiety about Dean. John held out a less than steady hand to halt their questions.

“He’s had a little setback,” John said, mildly. “Apparently, there was unseen damage when they did the first surgery that his liver was slightly damaged. It was leaking bile into his stomach, which caused the yellow goop to leak out of his mouth. That damage, coupled with the blood loss from before caused him to have a seizure. The doctors have him back in surgery and are working to fix him up and get him back on track. We will have to worry about infection for the first 24-hours again, but Dr. Wilkes seems confident he will make a full recovery.”

Sam and Castiel sagged back into their seats. The teens couldn’t wrap their heads around this situation. Why did Dean have to suffer? Why was this happening to him? For Sam, he was facing losing his brother, his protector, his best friend, the person he always looked up to. For Castiel, he was facing losing his boyfriend, his best friend, his lover, his everything. Both boys sat in silence for the next several minutes, stunned into realizing the severity of Dean’s condition. Guilt continued to eat at Castiel. Even though everyone told him this wasn’t his fault, he couldn’t help but think that if he wouldn’t have been so stupid – if he wouldn’t have spoken so carelessly that Dean never would have gotten in that car. That Dean might have stayed with him, slept in his bed safe and warm, instead of laying exposed on a cold metal operating table as strangers used sharp instruments to cut into his exposed flesh.

Hours later, Naomi arrived at the hospital, bringing coffee and tea and greasy bags of fast food for the Winchesters and Castiel. She sat next to her son and tried to offer some level of comfort, and tried to convince him to come home, but he wouldn’t move. He didn’t want to leave until he knew that Dean was going to be okay. He picked at his burger and fries and half listened as the adults talked. Sam seemed just as withdrawn as he was, both lost in their own thoughts. Castiel was so lost in his own head that he didn’t notice for several seconds when Dr. Wilkes came into the room.

“He’s a fighter,” Dr. Wilkes was saying. “It was touch and go for a while, but he fought and came through. He is back in his room recovering. Due to the extent of the surgery, we will not be permitting visitors tonight. My recommendation to all of you is to go home, try to get some rest, and we will call you if there are any changes. If nothing changes, come back at 10 tomorrow morning for visiting hours and you can see him then.”

“Thank you, Doctor,” Mary murmured, not pleased with being banned from seeing her eldest son, but trying not to show her anger.

The Winchester-Novak families silently shuffled out of the waiting room and exchanged hugs and good-byes at the hospital entrance. They all agreed to meet back the next morning. On the drive home, Naomi reluctantly agreed that Castiel would miss school the next day to be with the Winchesters when they were able to see Dean for the first time. She knew, realistically, that she wouldn’t be able to keep her 18-year-old son away, and this just made relations between mother and son that much easier if she gave permission. Castiel thanked her, tonelessly and detached, and then woodenly climbed the steps to his bed and threw himself down, fully clothed, and fell into oblivion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let me know what you think. This story really has taken on a life of its own, so I'm curious to know what everyone thinks.


	6. Chapter 6

The next morning dawned bright and cold and found the Winchester-Novaks at their places in the hospital. By unspoken communication, they all met each other at the entrance of the hospital shortly before 10, and took the elevator up to Dean’s floor. No one heard from the hospital overnight. Mary had awoken at 7 and called for an update to be told that Dean had a peaceful night and there was no sign of fever or infection. The nurse said this was positive and everything was go for the family to visit.

Arriving at the ICU, the family made their way to Dean’s room, and were met by Dr. Wilkes.

“Ah, good,” the young doctor said pleasantly, “I’m glad I caught you. I wanted to let you know that everything seems to be improving. Dean’s vitals are much stronger and he appears ready to breathe on his own. We actually just removed the ventilator a few moments ago. He is a remarkably stubborn young man, and he has fought very hard. I think I can safely say he will recover just fine from this now that we found and repaired the damage to his liver. We are preparing to move him to a regular room where you all will be able to visit with him, without time restrictions.”

The collective sigh of relief from the family was almost embarrassingly loud, and it was as though a huge visible weight had been removed from them. For the first time in almost a week, Castiel felt a smile tug at his face, the feeling almost foreign. Dean was going to be okay.

It was about an hour later that the family was allowed into Dean's new room. This room looked remarkably similar to the ICU room, but for some reason, it seemed cheerier to Castiel, maybe that was just because he knew his wonderful, brash boyfriend was on the mend.

He was alone in the room with Dean for the moment. John had to go to work, Naomi was back at the Novak house, and Mary had taken Sam to get something to eat. Castiel didn't mind being alone, he liked having this time to talk to his boyfriend.

"You know, you scared the shit out of me," he said conversationally to his still unconscious boyfriend. "I think I am going to have nightmares for the rest of my life of getting that first call from your mom and then seeing you in ICU for the first time."

Cas felt he had cried too much in recent days, but he couldn't help a few errant tears as they streaked down his face, remembering his panic and fear in those first few days.

"I know you like to pretend to be all macho and tough, but I think you need to prepare for the mother of all chick-flick moments when you wake up," Castiel said this with a small smile as he started stroking his hand softly up and down his boyfriend's arm, still mindful of the tubes and wires connected. "I don't think I am ever going to be able to let you go again. I think it is going to be a long time before you can leave my house without me having a slight panic attack, fair warning."

As Castiel sat, he continued to talk to his boyfriend about everything and nothing. He avoided talking about the guilt he felt and the responsibility he felt for Dean being injured, but the dark haired teen kept up a steady flow of one-sided dialogue just to let Dean know he was there.

Castiel was in the middle of talking about how Ash hacked into the school's computers and gave everyone "A's" in Mr. Adler's class when he noticed something was different. Looking at Dean, Castiel blinked for a moment before he realized that glazed green eyes were looking back at him.

"Dean!?" Castiel exclaimed. "You're awake, oh my God, you're awake, I can't believe you are awake, I've waited so many days to have you wake up and now you are awake. How are you feeling? Are you in any pain? Can I get something for you? Do you want some water? Do you need some pain meds? Where does it hurt? What do you remember? Oh my God, you are awake!"

Castiel couldn't stem the flow of words spewing from his mouth, and by the time he finally stopped to breathe, he noticed his boyfriend quirking a small smile back at him.

"One question at a time, dude," Dean snarked softly.

"I am so sorry Dean," Cas couldn't keep the words in. He had waited so long. "I am so sorry what I said when you left my house. I didn't mean it the way it sounded. I know you are smart. You just take so much on yourself, and you shouldered so much responsibility, I look up to you so much. You are my hero, my angel, and I just said the absolute wrong thing in the wrong way. I have been so anxious for you to wake up so I could apologize properly. I love you so much, please forgive me."

"Deep breaths, Cas," Dean advised his overwrought boyfriend. "I'm not going anywhere."

"I was so scared, Dean," Cas said, his voice breaking and the tears flowing again. "You were so pale, and they said they lo-lost you. I can't be without you. I need you."

"I need you, too, Cas," Dean said, squeezing Cas' hand weakly.

"I should go and let everyone know you are awake," Cas said, somewhat reluctant to leave his boyfriend's side. "We have all been so worried, and I am sure the Doctor will want to see you now that you are awake."

"One kiss before you go?" Dean asked hopefully.

"I'll give you as many as you can stand once you are out of here," Cas said, the playful flirting tone somewhat stilted after so many days of worry. "But for now, yes, you can have one kiss before I go."

Cas leaned over and gave his boyfriend a soft kiss on the lips and smiled as he pulled away taking in the beloved green eyes and freckles of the most important person in his world.

"I'll be back soon," Cas said, quickly giving Dean another kiss (he couldn't help it).

"I'll be right here waiting for you," Dean said.

"Dude, did you just quote Richard Marx lyrics to me?" Cas queried as he cocked his head slightly to the side. "That is probably the lamest thing you have ever said to me."

"Shuddup," Dean slurred slightly. "I get a pass because of all the pain meds, I don't even remember what I said."

"Yeah, right," Cas laughed softly as he turned to walk out the door. For the first time since their awful fight that led to the accident, Cas felt hopeful. He just knew everything was going to be alright.

 


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a short and sweet chapter to send Dean and Cas on their way happily into the sunset like all good couples must.

Three days later and Dean was driving everyone up the wall. The family had been so happy to have him wake up and begin to act like himself that there were a lot of tears. However, it didn’t take long before Dean was the worst patient imaginable. He hated being in the hospital, and complained loudly to everyone who would listen that he wanted to get out of there. John actually had to carry him back to his room two days previous when he found his eldest son trying to sneak out of the hospital. Dean claimed he was just going to the cafeteria to try to get some pie, somehow his father knew better.

But today was a great day. Despite Dean’s snarky and cutting comments, he was coming home today. He still had a way to go to fully recover, but he at least could do the rest of the recovery outside of the hospital. Castiel was thrilled. If he never had to see his boyfriend in a hospital again, or smell the disgusting scents of bleach and alcohol combined, it would be too soon.

As Castiel had the day off school, he asked John and Mary if he could be the one to bring Dean home. The Winchesters agreed as it would give them some time to catch up on their jobs and make some additional arrangements for Dean’s care in the next several days until he was cleared to go back to school. The dark haired boy walked into Dean’s hospital room, and saw his boyfriend bouncing on the bed in his excitement to get out of there.

“Hey babe,” Castiel said with a slight chuckle, “are you ready to blow this pop stand?”

“Hells yeah,” Dean said. “I can’t wait to get home. Eat actual food, not cardboard replicas. Sleep in a real bed. Cuddle with my boyfriend, you know, all the stuff I haven’t been able to do recently.”

Castiel smirked at his boyfriend, knowing that despite the swaggering tone, Dean really had been scared and uncomfortable being in the hospital. Cas and the Winchesters had taken shifts to stay with Dean as much as possible so the teen didn't have to be alone too much. The day John had to break the news about the Impala being in the repair yard had not been a pleasant day - Cas actually thinks Dean shed a few tears, although the other teen would never admit it.

Now, they were going home. Castiel would have a whole day to spend with his boyfriend, and he planned to spend it talking about their future and where they would go in the fall. Castiel didn’t care anymore. He would go to Kansas State, he would go to Timbuktu, he didn’t care as long as he had Dean by his side they would be able to accomplish anything.

“Ready to go babe?” Dean asked with a smile, as he reluctantly sat in the wheelchair the hospital staff was forcing him to ride in to the exit.

Castiel leaned down and gave his boyfriend a quick kiss on the lips, “I’m ready, my love.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much to everyone who has made it this far. I meant for this to be a short one-shot story that got stuck in my head at 6:30 in the morning, and it turned into the longest piece I have ever written as fan fiction, and my first multi-chapter adventure. I hope you have enjoyed the journey. I have loved writing it and sharing it with you all. Please let me know what you thought, ways to improve, things that you liked. I am so happy for everyone who has read along with me :-)
> 
> Cheers!


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